The Childfree Life

Thanks for the support given during Willows latest episode of illness. She is doing much better and is finally done pooping old blood. Whew, hopefully things stay good for awhile.

I’ve debated the direction I want to go with the blog. I like the idea of offering support to women who are choosing to live child free or considering it as an option to resolve their infertility. I have also toyed with the idea of getting involved in the extremely small “living child free after infertility and loss” blog community. The problem is that it kind of feels like I am continuing to dwell on my infertility if I do. On the other hand I probably shouldn’t completely ignore/repress that aspect of my life because it is a part of who I am, whether I like it or not. Part of me (most of me)wants to be perceived as a carefree childless woman who never feels any heartache because of her circumstances, but that’s not really true. I did and still do experience heartache because of all this. As much as I wish I could erase my whole infertility history I am still dealing with the ramifications from that relatively brief but intense part of my life. So in interest of total honesty I will occasionally include a post on the realities of living a child free life after infertility. But I refuse to have this be the focus of my blog.

I also really need to expand the focus of my blog reading from infertility/parenting to include other areas. If anyone has any recommendations I would welcome them. I am interested in baking blogs, gardening blogs, green living blogs, travel and adventure blogs, dog parenting blogs, etc. Let me know if anyone has any suggestions.

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Puppy update

No bloody stool last night and she has started howling her head off again. Sounds like she’s doing better. Since she’s being so loud I’m guessing they will want her to go home sooner rather than later. That dog bounces back quickly.

Sick Puppy

This morning I came home from work to puddles of very bloody diarrhea and a lethargic shaking Willow. I call the vet in a panic, describe the horrific scene and she tells me she has an appointment at 415 or 5..which would I like? I less than calmly informed her that I would be right in, I would not wait until 415 thank you very much. At the vet I was told she had Hemorrhagic Gastroenteritis and was going into shock (from blood loss). They admitted her for fluids, steroids and antibiotics and sent me home. I googled this and found hundreds of stories about how it came on suddenly and their dog died. Apparently the “don’t google rule” applies to dog health as well as infertility and pregnancy. I am just so worried about my baby, I trust my vet to fix her but I’m still worried. This is the same dog that ate her weight in dryer sheets in November, so this is her second hospitalization in a year. Sigh

This is my favorite pic of Willow EVER

This is my favorite pic of Willow EVER

Gone Fishin’

Yesterday I went on my first ever fishing trip. I caught two pretty good sized rainbow trout that we are going to smoke. My husband got one too. Yea! I think this could be a new hobby for me.  Following the Mediterranean Diet means eating more fish and fresh inexpensive fish is hard to come by in stores so we decided to catch our own. Jack used to fish a lot many years ago but he stopped going when he lost his fishing buddy so I became his new fishing partner.

It took us a little time to find a good spot, the first reservoir we tried was full of jet skis, speed boats and rednecks blaring the worst country music of all time. It made it hard to commune with nature and scared away all our fish. So we went farther out to a much more remote lake and the fishing was great. We saw so much wild life too. We saw cranes, pelicans, deer (one we almost hit with our car!!), and even a bald eagle. We were only at this spot for 4 hours but we caught 3 trout in that time, think about how many we could of caught if we had been there all day…. I tried my hand at gutting my own fish but I kind of butchered them so my husband had to step in but I’ll keep trying. I can really see this being a new hobby. Its sitting in peaceful nature relaxing interspersed with the occasional exhilaration of a catch.  Plus you get to take home delicious fish!

Not the best picture of me but check out those fish!

Not the best picture of me but check out those fish!

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Today I am grateful for….toilets

I have always been interested in the topic of sanitation and its link to clean drinking water, but today as I read through a chapter in my Global Health class about how many people lack access to proper toilets  and how it impacts the lives of those people I am feeling overwhelmingly grateful that I am one of the lucky few who has access to her own private(well I do have to share with Jack) flushing toilet. I constantly overlook the luxury I experience every time I use the toilet and a stream of sparkling fresh water carries my unhygienic waste far far away. Dont even get me started on the luxury of running water….

Food for thought:

The average woman in a under developed country spends several hours a day just fetching clean-ish water .. and here I am feeling stressed out about how much I have to get done in a day.

3.4 million people a year die from waterborne and diarrheal illnesses, related to poor sanitation, and most of them are children. Imagine if I had to worry about my nephews dying from something as simple as lack of a toilet.

Not having a toilet increases your risk of being raped, did you know that? While statisitcs are hard to gather on sensitive topics such as rape, many women who lack access to toilets report being sexually assaulted while practicing open defecation. Makes sense, go out in the dark looking for a secluded spot to go… perfect conditions for a rapist… 

Its crazy how something so simple and basic can make such a difference in my life. I will try never to take my toilet for granted again. 

 

Ps. Please consider making a donation to an organization that provides sanitation in developing countries such as water.org. A clean water supply benefits us all. Also for further reading on such a fascinating topic pick up a copy of The Big Necessity:The Unmentionable World of Human Waste and Why It Matters by Rose George. One of my favorite books of all time.