Shaking off the hormone blues

Still feeling kind of meh about everything. At work I have a serious case of the “I don’t give a fuck”s. So yesterday I made it my mission to shake it all off and have some fun.

We started the day at the last VW show of the season where I met my next dream bus. He is a Vanagon Syncro Westy (made after 1986) and is a total bad ass. He has 4 wheel drive, camping interior and even a solar panel for all your electricity needs.



Next we came home to pick up the dogs and it was off to Antelope Island State Park for some hiking fun. True to its name Antelope Island has herds of wild antelope as well as a domestic herd of buffalo and a huge migratory bird population. The dogs had a blast. Sprinkles loves to ride around in our VW bus (named Heinrich) and Willow (all 18 pounds of her) thought she could take down a buffalo. She was howling and trying to chase them which was cute and a little scary at the same time since they were just hanging out on the trail. Luckily these are not wild like at Yellowstone and are used to being handled by humans so they just gave our noisy dog a dirty look and walked away.

On the trail we met a girl visiting from the Czech republic who had ridden her bike (a mountain bike, not a road bike) from Salt Lake City to the park which was a 6 hour ride. Since it was getting late in the day and she didn’t relish the idea of a 6 hour ride back (she had underestimated how far the journey was) she apparently decided that a couple with 2 beagles and a hippie bus were non threatening and asked us for a ride home. I was happy to oblige having found my self stranded in foreign countries dependent on the kindness of strangers before. I was happy to pay it forward and hell, we could use all the good karma we can get at this point. So we had a lovely ride back to town and a new friend if we should ever find ourselves in the Czech republic (some day soon I hope). We ended with a sunset hike in the mountains over looking the valley and some ice cream. (my sunset pictures didn’t turn out)




Plugging along

It’s been awhile since my last post. Life has been busy, we’ve been pushing the renovations, I’ve been working a ton, and we even had a sick puppy scare today. The lupron makes me grumpy and antisocial. I’m starting to feel a little better since the dose was decreased to 5 iu. Good enough to have one last fling with the girls before entering the world of responsible adulthood and parenthood. We had a good time but man was I hung over.

My sister had her baseline ultrasound today. I had a mild freak out when her antral follicle count had decreased from 35 to 14 (same # as mine) but they explained she was just suppressed on the lupron and her ovaries should perk right up. Her med doses are half of what mine were. Also 3 different people told her how amazing what she was doing for me was. It made both of us uncomfortable. We come from a family where helping each other is just what you do, no fanfare, no gushing just helping each other and knowing if you need them they have your back. That’s how we roll. I have helped my sister out many times is difficult times and I never once felt the need for thanks. Now whenever people find out what we are doing they start to tell her how amazing she is and look to me to join in. But I don’t, because saying she is amazing is shallow and does nothing to describe the bond we have. She’s not amazing, she’s family. That’s all that ever needs to be said.

Of cervixes and 20,000 dollar checks

Its been a busy week for cycle related happenings. Thursday I spent the day waiting for out 401 k check to arrive via UPS and having my cervix chemically dilated by Cytotec. It was not the most comfortable experience and I think it was made worse by my anxiety over waiting for the 20,000 check to arrive safely (the UPS was the best option offered to us to obtain the funds by our broker). I must assure you that my anxiety was not misplaced. Aside from the large value of the check, UPS and Fed-ex have a terrible track record of delivering packages to our house in a timely and satisfactory manor. The worst incident occured last Christmas. My husband’s major hobby besides cars is making his own beer (he knew I was the “one” when I got him his beer making kit for our first Christmas). This last year I thought it would be great to expand his hobby and I bought him a pot still for “the distilling of water and essential oils” <wink wink>.I spent a very tidy sum on it as it had all stainless steel components and was very well made. It was due to be delivered 2 days before Christmas but when I checked the status of the package towards the end of the day it said it had already been delivered and left on the porch. I freaked out because it was clearly not here. I searched all over outside (ps the still is huge and would be hard to miss) and looked around all my closest neighbors houses as well, nothing. I called Fed-Ex (the guilty party, though we have had problems with UPS too) and all they kept repeating was “my screen here says its been delivered” no matter how many times I told them it wasn’t here. They basically told me once the driver says the’ve delivered it I’m SOL, even if it wasn’t actually delivered.  I sobbed and sobbed because Christmas was ruined, I knew I was going to make my husbands day with my gift and now I had nothing. Plus I was now out several hundred dollars with nothing to show for it. The next day I got a knock on my door and it was a lady who lived several houses down. Despite the fact that both of our houses were clearly marked with our respective house numbers they had delivered my package to her. She had opened it, the nosy woman, and she was the president of our HOA. Not something you want people to know you have let alone the board president. When I called Fed-Ex to complain it was delivered to the wrong address their response was “well my screen here says it was delivered to your address” no amount of pointing out facts to the contrary would get them to admit their mistake. So back to my original point, I was very anxious all day waiting for that check, which the whole cycle depended on, and it finally came at 9 pm. ACK!

Friday went much better, the Cytotec, while uncomfortable, had pre-dilated my cervix and relaxed the muscles so they were able to dilate it much more than last time. The pain was also less than last time. The first time I had this done I was given a script for 2 Lortab and 2 Valium but I only took one of each because I was too chicken but this time around I took them both! One of the instruments did nick a hole in my cervix so I had to get a stitch but I hardly noticed it. Hopefully it will manage to stay open since they were able to dilate it so much more. My doctor didn’t thing my idea of sticking a cork in it was a very viable option. My husband bought me an adorable rug for my woodland themed nursery as a prize for going through the procedure, so over all a good day. <He got it at Ikea for only 25 bucks!>

My cute rug for the nursery