Of cervixes and 20,000 dollar checks

Its been a busy week for cycle related happenings. Thursday I spent the day waiting for out 401 k check to arrive via UPS and having my cervix chemically dilated by Cytotec. It was not the most comfortable experience and I think it was made worse by my anxiety over waiting for the 20,000 check to arrive safely (the UPS was the best option offered to us to obtain the funds by our broker). I must assure you that my anxiety was not misplaced. Aside from the large value of the check, UPS and Fed-ex have a terrible track record of delivering packages to our house in a timely and satisfactory manor. The worst incident occured last Christmas. My husband’s major hobby besides cars is making his own beer (he knew I was the “one” when I got him his beer making kit for our first Christmas). This last year I thought it would be great to expand his hobby and I bought him a pot still for “the distilling of water and essential oils” <wink wink>.I spent a very tidy sum on it as it had all stainless steel components and was very well made. It was due to be delivered 2 days before Christmas but when I checked the status of the package towards the end of the day it said it had already been delivered and left on the porch. I freaked out because it was clearly not here. I searched all over outside (ps the still is huge and would be hard to miss) and looked around all my closest neighbors houses as well, nothing. I called Fed-Ex (the guilty party, though we have had problems with UPS too) and all they kept repeating was “my screen here says its been delivered” no matter how many times I told them it wasn’t here. They basically told me once the driver says the’ve delivered it I’m SOL, even if it wasn’t actually delivered.  I sobbed and sobbed because Christmas was ruined, I knew I was going to make my husbands day with my gift and now I had nothing. Plus I was now out several hundred dollars with nothing to show for it. The next day I got a knock on my door and it was a lady who lived several houses down. Despite the fact that both of our houses were clearly marked with our respective house numbers they had delivered my package to her. She had opened it, the nosy woman, and she was the president of our HOA. Not something you want people to know you have let alone the board president. When I called Fed-Ex to complain it was delivered to the wrong address their response was “well my screen here says it was delivered to your address” no amount of pointing out facts to the contrary would get them to admit their mistake. So back to my original point, I was very anxious all day waiting for that check, which the whole cycle depended on, and it finally came at 9 pm. ACK!

Friday went much better, the Cytotec, while uncomfortable, had pre-dilated my cervix and relaxed the muscles so they were able to dilate it much more than last time. The pain was also less than last time. The first time I had this done I was given a script for 2 Lortab and 2 Valium but I only took one of each because I was too chicken but this time around I took them both! One of the instruments did nick a hole in my cervix so I had to get a stitch but I hardly noticed it. Hopefully it will manage to stay open since they were able to dilate it so much more. My doctor didn’t thing my idea of sticking a cork in it was a very viable option. My husband bought me an adorable rug for my woodland themed nursery as a prize for going through the procedure, so over all a good day. <He got it at Ikea for only 25 bucks!>

My cute rug for the nursery

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2 thoughts on “Of cervixes and 20,000 dollar checks

  1. Grr…your story about FedEx/UPS makes me angry for you. I can’t stand it when companies don’t accept responsibility for their actions, much less actually believe the customer when they call with an issue. I’ve experienced similar situations a little too frequently. Now, I go directly to a supervisor and skip the lower level employee. They don’t have any authority to do anything about it anyway.

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